A few thoughts.
I love to talk. Being vulnerable helps me heal. Sharing is caring after all, right?
Are you guilty of this too? Praying hard for something and thinking "If I just have faith, God will provide (give me what I want as soon as I'm asking)...". We may not want to admit it, but I'll be honest it happens more often than I even realize. Faith isn't the word that comes to mind here...Control is what that is. Guilty for sure.
Listen, I'm a praying kind of girl. I talk to God all day long. It wasn't always as easy as it seems now...but it's better for my soul this way. To each their own right? Fact is, its human nature is to plan. We drive ourselves batty trying to have some sort of control in our future. It's a lie. We control nothing. I don't even mind if you aren't a believer in Jesus, (that's a loaded comment but a topic for another blog) but control is a figment of our human imaginations.
So why do we cling so tightly to it?? Why do we torture ourselves only to have everything work out differently than we planned, yet still exactly how it should be? Every. Single. Time. I believe it's a defense mechanism. Protection from failure. No one likes failure. In fact it shuts me down. We plan everything so that we are "prepared" for what's "waiting" around the next corner. Truth is...we must stop it. Now. We must stop counting down the days. Stop thinking "when this happens...everything will be better or make sense." It won't and we are wasting time. They don't say hind sight is 20/20 for no reason.
We all have a specific plan and precious gifts that are ALL ours. Identify them, develop them, and use them. It's selfish to keep your light all to yourself. AND...Don't worry about anyone else's behavior, it doesn't matter and trying to understand it will steal your joy. Simple as that.
Please stop thinking that planning gives us control. It doesn't. Sure...discussing things ahead of time and dreaming bigger isn't what I mean by "stop planning". What I mean is this...stop deciding what your future will look like, praying for what you've decided looks good, and then getting let down when something different happens. It's not that God doesn't love you...it means there is something soooo much better ahead. Believe that. Life always works itself out. Always. ALSO, When negative things happen STOP packing them up and carrying them to the future. They don't belong in your future. Use them to grow and learn. Not plan. Now I hope you can see that planning is simply the idea that "if we are prepared" we can't fail. Ridiculous. Failure is the very place that beauty is born. Have faith that your journey is important and open your mind to all the possibilities.
Faith isn't about getting what we want...it's about seeing that our journey, good and bad, is perfectly designed for us. Don't block your blessings because you think you've got a better plan. Learn to love your journey, yourself, and leave a mark.